If your Grandma asks…Do It…Free the Chump..

When grandma asks you to stop smoking…you do it.

At CNN.com there was a signup for CNN’s special New You Resolution , January 2006. One of the participants who made the cut resolved to try to quit smoking, to date she’s down to two cigarettes a day. Her grandmother asked her to stop smoking. see also CNN for more of the program, “New You Resolution”:

Gosh, I sure hate to have to take my landlord to court because of the smoker down below. Really, two layers of tatami mats and yoga mats in between and they are all grey/browned with cigarette smoke from the night before. Every day I vacuum them off and let them stand. Its been going on for well over a year. Talk about Puff the bad, bad dragon. I’ve made copies of the papers wherein the hospital diagnoses heart and pulmonary disease.

You see I’ve suffered, indeed, for the chumps of this world. Previously I lived for five years in a loft in Poughkeepsie, NY. In the sixth year six adjacent and party walling apartments were leased to weed and cigarette smoking chumps. I think that’s what started my sickness. Anyway when I politely asked the landlord, he haughtily quoted the law and rights of the cigarette smoker. I went to said landlord’s office to take back a new lease. His office was full of smoking fiends. hmm.
I have this sort of fantasy that the smoker who lives below me is this chimpanzee with big ears being held captive by some overzealous pre-med student at Columbia U supplying black russian cig cartons and dry martinis at midnight. If I could only find a way to free the chimpanzee, would the Chump still find a way to feed his acquired addiction? I wonder about this chump currently below …does he/she/they/it have a grandmother?
On a sadder note, some non-smoking couple found their dream apartment in a New York City co-op that disallowed smoking. Talk about dream apartment. However, this couple did not like the rights issue involved. They withheld an offer. Wow! a survey of people in New York City indicated that 69% of the people surveyed would love to enjoy a smoke-free apartment building and 50% (assumedly of those 69%) would pay for the privilege. Choose me! source: nymetro, February 2006 issue, “no pets, no parties, no smoking”.

See also:
Will Blair be seen as Witch for taking Londoner’s Burning Blinky?

Does NYC love New Yorkers?

BOT’s “Wonder if its Possible?” questionnaire

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