From the beginning I told my Dad all your papers are safe. You have no worries for us. Tom Stoppard wrote every exit is an entrance. I know we are taking these exits all the time. We have lots of darknesses and then light, beauty. The process is continuous.
I never thought that a body can hold a soul back. My Dad’s body was strong. He went about nine days with no food or water; proving that one can be fed merely with pure thoughts and warm memories. For my Dad to have his wish for a natural passing no extreme measures would be used to keep his form, his body.
My Dad was in hospice care and all his critical signs of life had passed. I was told upon arrival that my Dad was waiting for me and it was odd to have this life combination. A nurse patted me on the back once and said ‘he’s not coming back.’ I told him “not to worry, he’s not being asked to. We are learning something here.”
My Dad has a very strong heart and could discern that we still needed to learn some things that we most likely would not have if he had just merely passed on once the physical instructions were released.
I was so fortunate to have six Days with my Dad celebrating Life as we both still knew it. In coma state a person can hear and they have some peripheral vision. Sometimes I cracked my Dad up. I played Yo-Yo Ma’s Peace and Joy for him and when after the serious yet joyful music had passed there was a song about how cute you are. My Dad had a goofey grin on his face. He showed me a full range of his emotions and it helped me understand his life and my life and how God is Life with no beginning and no ending.
This morning I was at his bedside with my baby sister. I was able to read him the sports page, the Psalms, my sister played mama mia and we read some of Eckard Tolle’s words about form and our attachments to it.
I have learned so much about my life this week; things I needed to learn.
We are connected, not attached, with my Dad, its a different grief.
I clearly see the communication plan now; I now have a 1st connection on the higher level and I’ll take that form of social networking any day.
Thank you Dad and God Bless!